Audition City: Boston, at the Colonial Theater
Judges: Nigel Lythgoe, Mary Murphy, Tyce D'Orio,
I'm partial to this episode because I'm from Massachusetts and I love seeing dancers from cities I know. Cheesy but true. Represent please, Mass!
First up: Teddy Tedholm, 18, clad in clown pants and a bowtie. He dances to Jason Mraz's "If It Kills Me," the song Jason & Jeanine did their great routine to just last season, when they kissed at the end. Anyway...Teddy jumps around doing not much dancing but some interesting moves, fairly entertaining.The judges like it. Weird. They can't decide if he's crazy or brilliant. he's going straight to Vegas. How odd.
Next auditioner: Jean Lloret, 22. He's a breaker with crazy-good power moves. Mary and Nigel both start yelling when he executes a move, where he does a sort of handstand while moving his legs up around him very slowly. The judges give him a ticket to Vegas without even discussing it. He's amazing.
We briefly see a man named Kimara Wood. He's the one wearing black pants, has dreads, and a great chest, and looks like he's flying. Straight to Vegas.
Another anonymous successful guy flashes by.
Now we meet Channing Cooke, 18,from Haverhill, MA, who is an ice cream scooper. A young blonde- cue tenting in Nigel's shorts. She has a great legs. Her routine is Contemporary Blah. A lot of posing. It gets more interesting as she goes on, and she starts to display some talent. Mary and Tyce love her, and all three judges say yes to choreography.
How does a guy this tall get through life without hitting his head on every door? Ryan Casey, 18, from Lexington, MA, is 6'8", and of course Nigel makes a basketball joke. Ryan is a tapper, and dances to funky rap number. Nigel notes that he has "very well educated ankles." Mmmkay. Nigel also asks if he passes out when he goes to Denver. Ha yeah, very funny. Oy vey. They mention that he has flappy arms, and send him off to choreography
A krumper has never made it to Vegas. Why bother having a legendary krumper like Lil C on staff if krumping isn't going to cut it on SYTYCD? Also, why does Nigel always ALWAYS pronounce it "Little C"? It's irksome.
Russell Ferguson is a krumper and he's a pleasure to watch. I won't say "Buck!" because that's stupid...but it's a little buck. Tyce, channeling Mia, describes his routine positively as "filthy, dirty!" They send him to choreography to see if he can handle other styles.
Tyce imitates Molly Shannon's crazy "Iloveitiloveitiloveit!" leg in the air lady on SNL. It's disturbing.
Now we have Fabrizio "Breeze" Jenkins, 26, of Roxbury. Popping/hip hop style. He was a 10 lb baby and says that he's called "Breeze" since his mom said he was a breeze to birth, it only took two hours. That's funny, I thought he was called Breeze because it's short for Fa-BREEZE-io. He's a good dancer for a club, I'd say...until he appears to fall over after his ankle buckles, but he gets up and keeps going. "A lot of fun" Nigel says and, "Yes to choreography." Tyce says no, and comes down to Mary...she says yes to Choreo.
Anya and Pasha handle the Choreography round again this week with that same Latin ballroom music.
Breeze checks out quickly from Choreo, his ankle's too fucked up and he's out of his league.
Tall guy Ryan does not go through to Vegas
Channing the blonde, Russell the krumper (the first one ever to go through on the show!), and eight others are on their way to Las Vegas.
Day 2 in Boston
Nigel opens the day by addressing the auditioners, and tells them to go home if they're not a star.
On to the auditions...
Married couple Karen and Matthew Hauer, both 27, are Latin ballroom dancers. They do a very good routine, sexy and they're very comfortable with each other obviously. Mary calls the wife "One hot tamale!" They both get tickets to Vegas.
Incidentally, Mary looks prettier and less bloated, I think the Botox finally settled in.
Cheesy Latin lovah Gene Bersten, 21, tries out solo. He works his hips constantly, shows off his ass, and does a split that quite frankly scared me. Mary calls him a Hottie Patottie. He then rips his shirt open, thereby tearing his number in half. Bwahaha. The judges advise Gene to control his face more, especially his eyebrows. Off to Choreography he goes.
We now meet the batshit crazy Paul Magliato, 46, a creepy bald dude in blue spandex who has the dead stare of a serial killer. He's too old for the competition, but of course they let him try out anyway so they can mock him. He sucks, naturally.
Some crappy auditions breeze by. There's a montage of Tyce acting like a dick, but it's Tyce, so he's still not that mean. Quick question, Tyce: how can dancing be like "nails on a chalkboard"? That expression applies to sound, not to sight. But I digress.
Kevin "Kbez" Hunte auditioned two seasons ago, and is a hip hop dancer. he says he's been training in contemporary but the judges feel he didn't show it. He's off to Choreography to prove himself.
Choreography Round, Day 2: Kbez and Gene, and 21 others are sent to Vegas! Did I hear them right? 21 sounds like way more than usual. Oh well.
Next week: Atlanta..y'all!
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
GLEE Ep 4: PREGGERS
Wow. Incredible episode. There's something about this show that just makes me so damn happy after watching it.
Alright, onto the recap/review...
The episode opens with...
Oh dear, Choreographis Interruptus. Kurt explains to his dad (guest star Mike O'Malley) that he's merely dancing in order to improve his football playing because he has joined the team, as the kicker. Dad is surprised and still spooked, frankly, but Kurt plays it off, and says that he and his dad will have something to talk about now. Now Kurt just has to figure out how the hell to back up this outrageous lie.
Teri and Will practice Lamaze breathing while Teri's sister Kendra visits and frightens Will with childbirth horror stories. She offers to massage Teri's belly. Teri panics, for obvious reasons, and gives Kendra the scoop after sending Will to the kitchen to make her a BLT. Kendra is surprisingly okay with the fake baby situation. Jennifer Aspen is great in this scene, especially her reaction to Teri panicking suddenly about having a baby. Her response? "Omigod, is the baby black?!"
Evil cheerleading coach Sue has been given her own spot on the local news, sharing her offensive opinions with the community. Her latest? Her ridiculously awesome pro-caning-in-school rant follows:
"To the people that say you can't smack children on their bare buttocks with razor sharp bamboo sticks I say, YES WE CANE!!!"
Sue's ratings are through the roof, and she rubs her new success in the other teachers' faces.
Glee Club is doing "Tonight" from "West Side Story" and Rachel is pissed that Will is giving Tina the solo. Rachel behaves like an entitled biotch, even after Will points out that Tina should be allowed to be happy about getting a solo for a change. Rachel feels that she has a special connection to Natalie Wood because they're both Jews.
Finn helps Kurt solve his kicker conundrum by getting him an "audition" with the football team. Kurt insists on trying out exactly as he has practiced- with "Singles Ladies" playing as he shimmies up to the ball and kicks it right between the goal posts. He makes the team, and acknowledges the cheering with a classic Miss America wave that I will turn into a gif as soon as a clip is online. Fucking beautiful moment.
A guy from the news station meets with Sue and tells her that she needs to remain a champion coach in order to keep her news gig. She resolves to fix the cheerleaders-defecting situation and pays a visit to Sandy, after blackmailing the principal into letting Sandy return to the school as an arts administrator. Sandy is going to help take down Glee.
Celibacy queen Quinn tells Finn that she's pregnant, despite them never having sex. Apparently he blew his wad during a hot tub encounter (bathing suits on, too) and she convinces him that she is preggers now. Finn is floored.
The new arts administrator is staging a production of Cabaret to steal away Rachel, and it works. Rachel auditions with Celine Dion's song, "Taking Chances." We only hear the tail of the song, but here is the full version with Lea Michele singing.
She gets the part, of course.
Will tries to talk to Rachel, admitting that they need her, but that the other members slack off because she does everything for them. The other singers need to know they can be stars too. Rachel rebuffs Will's attempt.
Will finds out that Sandy has returned to the school, and refuses to play nice about it. Sandy declares them adversaries.
Tina rehearses "Tonight" (no video or audio available yet that I've found, alas). She sounds very good, but is hard on herself. Will encourages her, noting that she stutters much less when she's confident. Tina says that Rachel is better, and they should give Rachel the Tonight solo because she'll quit otherwise.
Finn shows up at the rehearsal, and begins crying on Will's shoulder (literally) about the news of Quinn's pregnancy. Will doesn't know what he can do for Finn, other than help him contact a Planned Parenthood.Finn declines that help, but then asks Will for help with the football team, much to the teacher's surprise.
Finn explains that he and Puck were doing much better on the team since Will worked on dancing and loosening up with them for the Acafellas. Will doesn't think the football team will go for dancing, but agrees to try for Finn's sake.
Will tells Teri that Quinn is pregnant with an unwanted baby, and Teri's wheels start turning...
The team is predictably opposed to the dancing idea, but Coach Tanaka is for it and so they give it a try since they suck so badly. Kurt leads them in dancing to "Single Ladies" (of course.) One of the players looks like an average-height, really fat version of Herve Villechaise. As dance practice ends, Finn tells Puck about the pregnancy.
Puck is surprised, since he knows Quinn and Finn weren't having sex. He looks REALLY shocked. Hmmm.... I wonder...
Puck approaches Quinn, saying, "Sup, MILF." We learn that Puck got Quinn drunk of wine coolers and had sex with her, and she allowed it since she was feeling fat that day.Puck shockingly is somewhat sweet about it, offering to help take care of the baby because it's his, but Quinn insults him and runs off to her car crying.
Who should be in her car waiting, but Teri, lurking creepily.
She doesn't know Teri, but Teri know who she is and what her problem is. She offers to help, starting with prenatal vitamins: "Take these three times a day or your baby will be ugly." Quinn is puzzled, and wonders what Teri wants from her. Oooh! Ooh! I know the answer! I think we all do.
Time for the big football game. The team is doing horribly but refuse to dance because they'll get made fun of. Kurt sees his dad is there, watching the game, and Kurt jumps and waves at him in a way that is eerily reminiscent of the old Homocil faux commercial from SNL.
A rival team player heckles Puck, who retorts that he had sex with that guy's mom. He then elaborates, "No really, I cleaned your pool and then I had sex with your mom on your bed. Nice Star Wars sheets." Heh. I'm loving Puck so much the last two episodes.
Finn calls time out with one second on the clock, and the team agrees to give Kurt's dancing idea a try finally. The music starts, and the big beefy players bust out moving to "Single Ladies" again. The crowd loves it, and the boys find their groove, making a great play, leading to an opportunity for Kurt to kick. If he gets the goal, they win the game. Now really, what do YOU think happens?
Kurt steps up, and takes his musical kick...and it's good! The team carries Kurt, the boy they were beating up on the first episode, on their shoulders across the field. Kurt blows a kiss happily to the crowd.
Quinn and Finn kiss in celebration, while Puck watches on jealously.
Now...a big scene. Big beautiful important scene. I got a little weepy here, I have to admit. Took me back to high school, and seeing several of my friends deal with being gay in high school.
Kurt's dad tells him that he's proud of him and wishes Kurt's late mother could be there to see him. Kurt musters up the courage, and tells his dad he has something to tell his dad, because he doesn't want to lie anymore. Quietly, Kurt finally tells his dad that he's gay. His dad says...he knows. He's known since Kurt was three, and asked for sensible heels for birthday. He's not in love with the idea, but if that's who Kurt is, there's nothing Dad can do about it, but he loves Kurt just as much.
Sniff.
Denouement for tonight:
Finn gives Quinn his baby blanket, and Puck swings by their lockers to comment on Quinn gaining weight. Finn defends her, and Puck uncharacteristically backs off.
Will refuses to back down on the issue of the West Side Story solo. Rachel officially quits Glee. Will then announces that three football players have joined Glee- Puck and two other guys whose names escaped me. Mmmmmm more Puck.
Thus endeth the story.
Next week: Kristen Chenoweth brings her amazing Tony-and-Emmy-winning self to Glee. Rachel slaps Finn! And we finally see "Somebody To Love."
Alright, onto the recap/review...
The episode opens with...
Oh dear, Choreographis Interruptus. Kurt explains to his dad (guest star Mike O'Malley) that he's merely dancing in order to improve his football playing because he has joined the team, as the kicker. Dad is surprised and still spooked, frankly, but Kurt plays it off, and says that he and his dad will have something to talk about now. Now Kurt just has to figure out how the hell to back up this outrageous lie.
Teri and Will practice Lamaze breathing while Teri's sister Kendra visits and frightens Will with childbirth horror stories. She offers to massage Teri's belly. Teri panics, for obvious reasons, and gives Kendra the scoop after sending Will to the kitchen to make her a BLT. Kendra is surprisingly okay with the fake baby situation. Jennifer Aspen is great in this scene, especially her reaction to Teri panicking suddenly about having a baby. Her response? "Omigod, is the baby black?!"
Evil cheerleading coach Sue has been given her own spot on the local news, sharing her offensive opinions with the community. Her latest? Her ridiculously awesome pro-caning-in-school rant follows:
"To the people that say you can't smack children on their bare buttocks with razor sharp bamboo sticks I say, YES WE CANE!!!"
Sue's ratings are through the roof, and she rubs her new success in the other teachers' faces.
Glee Club is doing "Tonight" from "West Side Story" and Rachel is pissed that Will is giving Tina the solo. Rachel behaves like an entitled biotch, even after Will points out that Tina should be allowed to be happy about getting a solo for a change. Rachel feels that she has a special connection to Natalie Wood because they're both Jews.
Finn helps Kurt solve his kicker conundrum by getting him an "audition" with the football team. Kurt insists on trying out exactly as he has practiced- with "Singles Ladies" playing as he shimmies up to the ball and kicks it right between the goal posts. He makes the team, and acknowledges the cheering with a classic Miss America wave that I will turn into a gif as soon as a clip is online. Fucking beautiful moment.
A guy from the news station meets with Sue and tells her that she needs to remain a champion coach in order to keep her news gig. She resolves to fix the cheerleaders-defecting situation and pays a visit to Sandy, after blackmailing the principal into letting Sandy return to the school as an arts administrator. Sandy is going to help take down Glee.
Celibacy queen Quinn tells Finn that she's pregnant, despite them never having sex. Apparently he blew his wad during a hot tub encounter (bathing suits on, too) and she convinces him that she is preggers now. Finn is floored.
The new arts administrator is staging a production of Cabaret to steal away Rachel, and it works. Rachel auditions with Celine Dion's song, "Taking Chances." We only hear the tail of the song, but here is the full version with Lea Michele singing.
She gets the part, of course.
Will tries to talk to Rachel, admitting that they need her, but that the other members slack off because she does everything for them. The other singers need to know they can be stars too. Rachel rebuffs Will's attempt.
Will finds out that Sandy has returned to the school, and refuses to play nice about it. Sandy declares them adversaries.
Tina rehearses "Tonight" (no video or audio available yet that I've found, alas). She sounds very good, but is hard on herself. Will encourages her, noting that she stutters much less when she's confident. Tina says that Rachel is better, and they should give Rachel the Tonight solo because she'll quit otherwise.
Finn shows up at the rehearsal, and begins crying on Will's shoulder (literally) about the news of Quinn's pregnancy. Will doesn't know what he can do for Finn, other than help him contact a Planned Parenthood.Finn declines that help, but then asks Will for help with the football team, much to the teacher's surprise.
Finn explains that he and Puck were doing much better on the team since Will worked on dancing and loosening up with them for the Acafellas. Will doesn't think the football team will go for dancing, but agrees to try for Finn's sake.
Will tells Teri that Quinn is pregnant with an unwanted baby, and Teri's wheels start turning...
The team is predictably opposed to the dancing idea, but Coach Tanaka is for it and so they give it a try since they suck so badly. Kurt leads them in dancing to "Single Ladies" (of course.) One of the players looks like an average-height, really fat version of Herve Villechaise. As dance practice ends, Finn tells Puck about the pregnancy.
Puck is surprised, since he knows Quinn and Finn weren't having sex. He looks REALLY shocked. Hmmm.... I wonder...
Puck approaches Quinn, saying, "Sup, MILF." We learn that Puck got Quinn drunk of wine coolers and had sex with her, and she allowed it since she was feeling fat that day.Puck shockingly is somewhat sweet about it, offering to help take care of the baby because it's his, but Quinn insults him and runs off to her car crying.
Who should be in her car waiting, but Teri, lurking creepily.
She doesn't know Teri, but Teri know who she is and what her problem is. She offers to help, starting with prenatal vitamins: "Take these three times a day or your baby will be ugly." Quinn is puzzled, and wonders what Teri wants from her. Oooh! Ooh! I know the answer! I think we all do.
Time for the big football game. The team is doing horribly but refuse to dance because they'll get made fun of. Kurt sees his dad is there, watching the game, and Kurt jumps and waves at him in a way that is eerily reminiscent of the old Homocil faux commercial from SNL.
A rival team player heckles Puck, who retorts that he had sex with that guy's mom. He then elaborates, "No really, I cleaned your pool and then I had sex with your mom on your bed. Nice Star Wars sheets." Heh. I'm loving Puck so much the last two episodes.
Finn calls time out with one second on the clock, and the team agrees to give Kurt's dancing idea a try finally. The music starts, and the big beefy players bust out moving to "Single Ladies" again. The crowd loves it, and the boys find their groove, making a great play, leading to an opportunity for Kurt to kick. If he gets the goal, they win the game. Now really, what do YOU think happens?
Kurt steps up, and takes his musical kick...and it's good! The team carries Kurt, the boy they were beating up on the first episode, on their shoulders across the field. Kurt blows a kiss happily to the crowd.
Quinn and Finn kiss in celebration, while Puck watches on jealously.
Now...a big scene. Big beautiful important scene. I got a little weepy here, I have to admit. Took me back to high school, and seeing several of my friends deal with being gay in high school.
Kurt's dad tells him that he's proud of him and wishes Kurt's late mother could be there to see him. Kurt musters up the courage, and tells his dad he has something to tell his dad, because he doesn't want to lie anymore. Quietly, Kurt finally tells his dad that he's gay. His dad says...he knows. He's known since Kurt was three, and asked for sensible heels for birthday. He's not in love with the idea, but if that's who Kurt is, there's nothing Dad can do about it, but he loves Kurt just as much.
Sniff.
Denouement for tonight:
Finn gives Quinn his baby blanket, and Puck swings by their lockers to comment on Quinn gaining weight. Finn defends her, and Puck uncharacteristically backs off.
Will refuses to back down on the issue of the West Side Story solo. Rachel officially quits Glee. Will then announces that three football players have joined Glee- Puck and two other guys whose names escaped me. Mmmmmm more Puck.
Thus endeth the story.
Next week: Kristen Chenoweth brings her amazing Tony-and-Emmy-winning self to Glee. Rachel slaps Finn! And we finally see "Somebody To Love."
Sunday, September 20, 2009
Emmy Predictions for Tonight's Show at 8
The Creative Arts Emmy Awards have already been given out. For a list of wins, visit the official Emmy site list here. This includes the Best Guest Actor/Actresses and Best Choreography (a must for SYTYCD nuts like me) categories, in addition to the sound editing/lighting crap that no one cares about.
The show starts tonight at 8PM, on CBS and will be hosted by Neil Patrick Harris.
Here's a list of the categories we'll see tonight, with my personal picks and favorites in bold.
Best Series, Drama
*
'Big Love'
*
'Breaking Bad'
*
'Damages'
*
'Dexter'
*
'House'
*
'Lost'
*
'Mad Men'
Best Series, Comedy
*
'30 Rock'
*
'Entourage'
*
'Family Guy'
*
'Flight Of The Conchords'
*
'How I Met Your Mother'
*
'The Office'
*
'Weeds'
Best Actor, Drama
*
Bryan Cranston
'Breaking Bad'
*
Michael C. Hall
'Dexter'
*
Hugh Laurie
'House'
*
Gabriel Byrne
'In Treatment'
*
Jon Hamm
'Mad Men'
*
Simon Baker
'The Mentalist'
Best Actor, Comedy
*
Alec Baldwin
'30 Rock'
*
Tony Shalhoub
'Monk'
*
Jim Parsons
'The Big Bang Theory'
*
Steve Carell
'The Office'
*
Charlie Sheen
'Two And A Half Men'
*
Jemaine Clement
'Flight Of The Conchords'
*
Best Actress, Drama
*
Sally Field
'Brothers & Sisters'
*
Glenn Close
'Damages'
*
Mariska Hargitay
'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit'
*
Holly Hunter
'Saving Grace'
*
Kyra Sedgwick
'The Closer'
*
Elisabeth Moss
'Mad Men'
Best Actress, Comedy
*
Tina Fey
'30 Rock'
*
Christina Applegate
'Samantha Who?'
*
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
'The New Adventures Of Old Christine'
*
Sarah Silverman
'The Sarah Silverman Program'
*
Mary-Louise Parker
'Weeds'
*
Toni Collette
'United States Of Tara'
Best Supporting Actor, Drama Series
*
William Shatner
'Boston Legal'
*
Christian Clemenson
'Boston Legal'
*
Aaron Paul
'Breaking Bad'
*
Michael Emerson
'Lost'
*
John Slattery
'Mad Men'
*
William Hurt
'Damages'
Best Supporting Actress, Drama Series
*
Rose Byrne
'Damages'
*
Hope Davis
'In Treatment'
*
Chandra Wilson
'Grey's Anatomy'
*
Sandra Oh
'Grey's Anatomy'
*
Dianne Wiest
'In Treatment'
*
Cherry Jones
'24'
Best Supporting Actor, Comedy Series
*
Kevin Dillon
'Entourage'
*
Tracy Morgan
'30 Rock'
*
Neil Patrick Harris
'How I Met Your Mother'
*
Rainn Wilson
'The Office'
*
Jon Cryer
'Two And A Half Men'
*
Jack McBrayer
'30 Rock'
Best Supporting Actress, Comedy Series
*
Kristin Chenoweth
'Pushing Daisies'
*
Kristen Wiig
'Saturday Night Live'
*
Amy Poehler
'Saturday Night Live'
*
Jane Krakowski
'30 Rock'
*
Vanessa Williams
'Ugly Betty'
*
Elizabeth Perkins
'Weeds'
Best Reality-Competition Program
*
'American Idol'
*
'Dancing With The Stars'
*
'Project Runway'
*
'The Amazing Race'
*
'Top Chef'
Best Host for a Reality or Reality-Competition Program
*
Ryan Seacrest
'American Idol'
*
Tom Bergeron
'Dancing With the Stars'
*
Phil Keoghan
'The Amazing Race'
*
Heidi Klum
'Project Runway'
*
Jeff Probst
'Survivor'
*
Padma Lakshmi and Tom Colicchio
'Top Chef'
Best Variety, Music or Comedy Series
*
'Late Show With David Letterman'
*
'Real Time With Bill Maher'
*
'Saturday Night Live'
*
'The Colbert Report'
*
'The Daily Show With Jon Stewart'
*
Best Miniseries
*
'Generation Kill'
*
'Little Dorrit'
Best Lead Actor, Miniseries or Movie
*
Kevin Kline
'Cyrano de Bergerac'
*
Brendan Gleeson
'Into The Storm'
*
Sir Ian McKellen
'King Lear'
*
Kevin Bacon
'Taking Chance'
*
Kiefer Sutherland
'24: Redemption'
*
Kenneth Branagh
'Wallander: One Step Behind'
*
Best Lead Actress, Miniseries or Movie
*
Chandra Wilson
'Accidental Friendship'
*
Shirley MacLaine
'Coco Chanel'
*
Drew Barrymore
'Grey Gardens'
*
Jessica Lange
'Grey Gardens'
*
Sigourney Weaver
'Prayers For Bobby'
The show starts tonight at 8PM, on CBS and will be hosted by Neil Patrick Harris.
Here's a list of the categories we'll see tonight, with my personal picks and favorites in bold.
Best Series, Drama
*
'Big Love'
*
'Breaking Bad'
*
'Damages'
*
'Dexter'
*
'House'
*
'Lost'
*
'Mad Men'
Best Series, Comedy
*
'30 Rock'
*
'Entourage'
*
'Family Guy'
*
'Flight Of The Conchords'
*
'How I Met Your Mother'
*
'The Office'
*
'Weeds'
Best Actor, Drama
*
Bryan Cranston
'Breaking Bad'
*
Michael C. Hall
'Dexter'
*
Hugh Laurie
'House'
*
Gabriel Byrne
'In Treatment'
*
Jon Hamm
'Mad Men'
*
Simon Baker
'The Mentalist'
Best Actor, Comedy
*
Alec Baldwin
'30 Rock'
*
Tony Shalhoub
'Monk'
*
Jim Parsons
'The Big Bang Theory'
*
Steve Carell
'The Office'
*
Charlie Sheen
'Two And A Half Men'
*
Jemaine Clement
'Flight Of The Conchords'
*
Best Actress, Drama
*
Sally Field
'Brothers & Sisters'
*
Glenn Close
'Damages'
*
Mariska Hargitay
'Law & Order: Special Victims Unit'
*
Holly Hunter
'Saving Grace'
*
Kyra Sedgwick
'The Closer'
*
Elisabeth Moss
'Mad Men'
Best Actress, Comedy
*
Tina Fey
'30 Rock'
*
Christina Applegate
'Samantha Who?'
*
Julia Louis-Dreyfus
'The New Adventures Of Old Christine'
*
Sarah Silverman
'The Sarah Silverman Program'
*
Mary-Louise Parker
'Weeds'
*
Toni Collette
'United States Of Tara'
Best Supporting Actor, Drama Series
*
William Shatner
'Boston Legal'
*
Christian Clemenson
'Boston Legal'
*
Aaron Paul
'Breaking Bad'
*
Michael Emerson
'Lost'
*
John Slattery
'Mad Men'
*
William Hurt
'Damages'
Best Supporting Actress, Drama Series
*
Rose Byrne
'Damages'
*
Hope Davis
'In Treatment'
*
Chandra Wilson
'Grey's Anatomy'
*
Sandra Oh
'Grey's Anatomy'
*
Dianne Wiest
'In Treatment'
*
Cherry Jones
'24'
Best Supporting Actor, Comedy Series
*
Kevin Dillon
'Entourage'
*
Tracy Morgan
'30 Rock'
*
Neil Patrick Harris
'How I Met Your Mother'
*
Rainn Wilson
'The Office'
*
Jon Cryer
'Two And A Half Men'
*
Jack McBrayer
'30 Rock'
Best Supporting Actress, Comedy Series
*
Kristin Chenoweth
'Pushing Daisies'
*
Kristen Wiig
'Saturday Night Live'
*
Amy Poehler
'Saturday Night Live'
*
Jane Krakowski
'30 Rock'
*
Vanessa Williams
'Ugly Betty'
*
Elizabeth Perkins
'Weeds'
Best Reality-Competition Program
*
'American Idol'
*
'Dancing With The Stars'
*
'Project Runway'
*
'The Amazing Race'
*
'Top Chef'
Best Host for a Reality or Reality-Competition Program
*
Ryan Seacrest
'American Idol'
*
Tom Bergeron
'Dancing With the Stars'
*
Phil Keoghan
'The Amazing Race'
*
Heidi Klum
'Project Runway'
*
Jeff Probst
'Survivor'
*
Padma Lakshmi and Tom Colicchio
'Top Chef'
Best Variety, Music or Comedy Series
*
'Late Show With David Letterman'
*
'Real Time With Bill Maher'
*
'Saturday Night Live'
*
'The Colbert Report'
*
'The Daily Show With Jon Stewart'
*
Best Miniseries
*
'Generation Kill'
*
'Little Dorrit'
Best Lead Actor, Miniseries or Movie
*
Kevin Kline
'Cyrano de Bergerac'
*
Brendan Gleeson
'Into The Storm'
*
Sir Ian McKellen
'King Lear'
*
Kevin Bacon
'Taking Chance'
*
Kiefer Sutherland
'24: Redemption'
*
Kenneth Branagh
'Wallander: One Step Behind'
*
Best Lead Actress, Miniseries or Movie
*
Chandra Wilson
'Accidental Friendship'
*
Shirley MacLaine
'Coco Chanel'
*
Drew Barrymore
'Grey Gardens'
*
Jessica Lange
'Grey Gardens'
*
Sigourney Weaver
'Prayers For Bobby'
Wednesday, September 16, 2009
GLEE: Ep 3- "Acafellas"
The episode should be called GUTS! because that's really what it's all about tonight.
Will tells his parents (played by Debra Monk and Victor Garber) that Teri's pregnant. Will's nervous about being a dad and his father tells him he just need guts. Will's dad settled for working in an insurance agency instead of going to law school, and regrets it. Dad says Will has to figure out if he has any guts.
Will is choreographing a number with Glee. Rachel complains about the dancing, after being prompted to by the cheer-saboteurs. The cheer-tators recommend a choreographer named Dakota Stanley. This is all very Sparky Pulastri.
Will vents to Emma about his stress. She's says it's okay because they're both in relationships, and basically they can talk now.
Sandy the ex-teacher (Stephen Tobolowsky is amazing, once again) isn't allowed within fifty feet of children, but that doesn't stop him from visiting the teachers lounge. The shop teacher, Henry, has returned after severing his thumbs in an unfortunate cough-medicine related saw accident. Sandy is glad Henry's back and notes that you'll get a "schoolful of nancies unless you get some hot wood in those teenagers' hands." One of many priceless lines tonight.
Will, Sandy, Henry and Ken observe how lame their lives are while enjoying some Welcome-Back Thumb cake. Ken Tanaka lives at the YMCA, and Sandy writes Desperate Housewives fanfic. Niiiice. The guys sing "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow " for Henry, and an idea is born.
The four men form an a capella group, with Howard the inventory guy. Howard suggests they call it...The Acafellas. They immediately vote out Sandy because he's creepy. Wills busts into "This is How We Do It." Heh, the first of many fun a capella numbers tonight.
In Teri news, Teri is screwing Will every week now (trying to get pregnant of course). Will has no clue the pregnancy isn't real.
Rachel brings Will cookies at school, and says he's missed six rehearsals since he's so wrapped up in the Acafellas. He blows her off, and Rachel pushes Glee to hire the choreographer.
Finn hates the idea and points out to Rachel that she's pissed at him about what happened between them, and Rachel says he has feelings for her and no guts to admit it. Finn can't deny it. Finn threatens to quit Glee if she hires Dakota Stanley, but Rachel intends to do it anyway. Good for Rachel. What would the new kid know about dancing, anyway?
Sue touches base with her squad of skirted spies. She reminisces about being a part of the strike team in Panama that went after Noriega. She encourages them to push the choreographer issue to help ruin Glee. Jane Lynch, as Sue, is perfect this week. She's like a drill instructor in track pants and severe makeup.
Hanging out at their lockers, Mercedes asks Kurt if he's ever kissed anyone. Kurt says, "Yes, if by yes, you mean the tender crook of my elbow." Then he spritzes the hairspray on. PERFECT! I love this kid. Kurt reiterates to Mercedes that they are the lowest in the social order and get no love. The passing cheer-infilitrators tell Mercedes that she should go after Kurt.
The Aca-pellas do Bell Biv Devoe's "Poison" at a local bar. AWESOME. Tanaka raps and it's great. Funniest thing I've seen all week. Principal Figgins, Teri and Emma all watch. Principal Figgins asks the group to perform at the PTA meeting to make the parents happy since the school's been serving prison food.
Sandy is bitter about his ouster and wants in. He can get Josh Groban to come to their PTA show, and he heard Josh is looking for an opening act. ooOOOOoo
Outside by Kurt's SUV, on the way to find the choreographer....everyone admires the vehicle and Kurt tells that his dad bought him a car after Kurt promised to stop wearing form-fitting sweaters that stop at the knee. His glee-mates look him up and down and he says blithely, "What he doesn't know won't hurt him." Have I said how much I love this kid? Kurt then compliments Mercedes's outfit. They find the place where the choreographer is and find a girl is vomiting outside. She says he's a monster!
Dakota Stanley, played by Whit Hertford, is a short little bastard who shreds his brilliantly-performing singer-dancers, and ignores the Glee kids. He finally tells his fee is $8000 cover, plus $10000 bonus if they place top 3 in the Nationals.
PTA performance night arrives...and Henry cracks, and goes wild on the cough syrup. Howard quits, because his life is inventory or something.
Finn goes to Will and says he's quitting Glee. Will asks him to have the guts to not quit. Then he asks Finn to step in with the Acafellas for the big show.
Puck the jock (Mark Salling) surprisingly offers his services to Coach Tanaka in the acapella group. Puck thinks he has star potential. He plays the guitar, and he's sick of teenage girls, he wants cougars. Since he started doing music and hanging out with older women, he beats people up less now. Tanaka agrees to take Puck on, and threatens to kick his ass if Puck fucks up.Puck and Finn rehearse with Will, and it's good.
Rachel and Tina have a gay-vention for Mercedes, which is intervening when your friend likes a gay man. Mercedes is in denial, even after they point out that Kurt wore a corset to second period.
Mercedes explains that Kurt is sweet to her, and he is one of them. Guys don't ask out the Glee girls, and they're all lonely. Her friends leave it alone.
The cheerleaders hold a bikini carwash to raise money for the choreographer. This episode is 50% stolen from Bring It On and I don't care.
Mercedes and Kurt are cleaning his SUV. Mercedes still thinks they're dating and when she says so, Kurt tells her he's in love with someone else.
"Rachel?" she asks, and Kurt says, "Yes for several years now." It's obviously BS but Mercedes freaks out and smashes his window. Leading to....
Messing with a man's vehicle will never win his love, honey. But damn Amber Riley has a great voice.
Glee meets with Dakota Stanley now that they can afford him. He tells Kevin that he can't be in it because he can't dance, being paralyzed and all. He tells Kurt to shut his face gash. (Heh) And he feels like a woodland creature because Finn is freakishly tall! (Gloriously campy lines.) Everyone but Rachel and the cheerleaders walk out. Rachel has an epiphany and brings up the example of people telling Barbra Streisand that she needed a nose job when she started out. Glee don't need a choreographer. They'll win because they're different. She fires Dakota.
The Acafellas are getting ready and Tanaka is putting on mascara, because it makes his eyes pop. Josh Groban is there in the audience.
The 'fellas perform "I Wanna Sex You Up" with Sandy. Puck sings and dances well, getting on the floor, grinding a bit. Sue's reaction shot to this is GOLD. Half sneer, half lust. Jane Lynch, Emmys next year, count on it.
After the very successful show, the guys backstage meet Josh Groban. Turns out he actually came there to tell Sandy to stop emailing him, sending nude pics, sonnets, locks of hair, etc. He gives Sandy a restraining order and tells the Acafellas that the show was great.
Josh Groban hangs and talks to Will's mom. He tells he's tired of throngs of screaming teens and apparently likes drunks old broads.
Having tasted musical success, Will realizes that being a teacher is enough for him. His dad is happy for him and tells Will that he's decided to go to law school, that it's never too late.
Mercedes apologizes to Kurt for breaking his window. He says it doesn't matter anyway because his dad took his car away after he found Kurt's tiara collection. Kurt confesses that he doesn't really like Rachel and tells Mercedes simply, "I'm gay." He's never told anyone before and seems scared but relieved. Mercedes is okay with it. Kurt isn't ready to share this with the rest of Glee yet.
Sue is pissed her plan failed, and that Glee is more confident than ever. She makes the cheerleaders smell their own armpits so they'll know "the smell of failure." She revokes their tanning privileges for the rest of the semester. Quinn thanks her for teaching her that when you believe in yourself, you don't have to bring others down. Hmm. Quinn turning on Sue, and towards Glee for real? We'll see.
Glee is rehearsing as they were at the beginning. Rachel tells Will that the dancing is really good.
Next week: Sue and Sandy team up to take on Glee. Intriguing.
Will tells his parents (played by Debra Monk and Victor Garber) that Teri's pregnant. Will's nervous about being a dad and his father tells him he just need guts. Will's dad settled for working in an insurance agency instead of going to law school, and regrets it. Dad says Will has to figure out if he has any guts.
Will is choreographing a number with Glee. Rachel complains about the dancing, after being prompted to by the cheer-saboteurs. The cheer-tators recommend a choreographer named Dakota Stanley. This is all very Sparky Pulastri.
Will vents to Emma about his stress. She's says it's okay because they're both in relationships, and basically they can talk now.
Sandy the ex-teacher (Stephen Tobolowsky is amazing, once again) isn't allowed within fifty feet of children, but that doesn't stop him from visiting the teachers lounge. The shop teacher, Henry, has returned after severing his thumbs in an unfortunate cough-medicine related saw accident. Sandy is glad Henry's back and notes that you'll get a "schoolful of nancies unless you get some hot wood in those teenagers' hands." One of many priceless lines tonight.
Will, Sandy, Henry and Ken observe how lame their lives are while enjoying some Welcome-Back Thumb cake. Ken Tanaka lives at the YMCA, and Sandy writes Desperate Housewives fanfic. Niiiice. The guys sing "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow " for Henry, and an idea is born.
The four men form an a capella group, with Howard the inventory guy. Howard suggests they call it...The Acafellas. They immediately vote out Sandy because he's creepy. Wills busts into "This is How We Do It." Heh, the first of many fun a capella numbers tonight.
In Teri news, Teri is screwing Will every week now (trying to get pregnant of course). Will has no clue the pregnancy isn't real.
Rachel brings Will cookies at school, and says he's missed six rehearsals since he's so wrapped up in the Acafellas. He blows her off, and Rachel pushes Glee to hire the choreographer.
Finn hates the idea and points out to Rachel that she's pissed at him about what happened between them, and Rachel says he has feelings for her and no guts to admit it. Finn can't deny it. Finn threatens to quit Glee if she hires Dakota Stanley, but Rachel intends to do it anyway. Good for Rachel. What would the new kid know about dancing, anyway?
Sue touches base with her squad of skirted spies. She reminisces about being a part of the strike team in Panama that went after Noriega. She encourages them to push the choreographer issue to help ruin Glee. Jane Lynch, as Sue, is perfect this week. She's like a drill instructor in track pants and severe makeup.
Hanging out at their lockers, Mercedes asks Kurt if he's ever kissed anyone. Kurt says, "Yes, if by yes, you mean the tender crook of my elbow." Then he spritzes the hairspray on. PERFECT! I love this kid. Kurt reiterates to Mercedes that they are the lowest in the social order and get no love. The passing cheer-infilitrators tell Mercedes that she should go after Kurt.
The Aca-pellas do Bell Biv Devoe's "Poison" at a local bar. AWESOME. Tanaka raps and it's great. Funniest thing I've seen all week. Principal Figgins, Teri and Emma all watch. Principal Figgins asks the group to perform at the PTA meeting to make the parents happy since the school's been serving prison food.
Sandy is bitter about his ouster and wants in. He can get Josh Groban to come to their PTA show, and he heard Josh is looking for an opening act. ooOOOOoo
Outside by Kurt's SUV, on the way to find the choreographer....everyone admires the vehicle and Kurt tells that his dad bought him a car after Kurt promised to stop wearing form-fitting sweaters that stop at the knee. His glee-mates look him up and down and he says blithely, "What he doesn't know won't hurt him." Have I said how much I love this kid? Kurt then compliments Mercedes's outfit. They find the place where the choreographer is and find a girl is vomiting outside. She says he's a monster!
Dakota Stanley, played by Whit Hertford, is a short little bastard who shreds his brilliantly-performing singer-dancers, and ignores the Glee kids. He finally tells his fee is $8000 cover, plus $10000 bonus if they place top 3 in the Nationals.
PTA performance night arrives...and Henry cracks, and goes wild on the cough syrup. Howard quits, because his life is inventory or something.
Finn goes to Will and says he's quitting Glee. Will asks him to have the guts to not quit. Then he asks Finn to step in with the Acafellas for the big show.
Puck the jock (Mark Salling) surprisingly offers his services to Coach Tanaka in the acapella group. Puck thinks he has star potential. He plays the guitar, and he's sick of teenage girls, he wants cougars. Since he started doing music and hanging out with older women, he beats people up less now. Tanaka agrees to take Puck on, and threatens to kick his ass if Puck fucks up.Puck and Finn rehearse with Will, and it's good.
Rachel and Tina have a gay-vention for Mercedes, which is intervening when your friend likes a gay man. Mercedes is in denial, even after they point out that Kurt wore a corset to second period.
Mercedes explains that Kurt is sweet to her, and he is one of them. Guys don't ask out the Glee girls, and they're all lonely. Her friends leave it alone.
The cheerleaders hold a bikini carwash to raise money for the choreographer. This episode is 50% stolen from Bring It On and I don't care.
Mercedes and Kurt are cleaning his SUV. Mercedes still thinks they're dating and when she says so, Kurt tells her he's in love with someone else.
"Rachel?" she asks, and Kurt says, "Yes for several years now." It's obviously BS but Mercedes freaks out and smashes his window. Leading to....
Messing with a man's vehicle will never win his love, honey. But damn Amber Riley has a great voice.
Glee meets with Dakota Stanley now that they can afford him. He tells Kevin that he can't be in it because he can't dance, being paralyzed and all. He tells Kurt to shut his face gash. (Heh) And he feels like a woodland creature because Finn is freakishly tall! (Gloriously campy lines.) Everyone but Rachel and the cheerleaders walk out. Rachel has an epiphany and brings up the example of people telling Barbra Streisand that she needed a nose job when she started out. Glee don't need a choreographer. They'll win because they're different. She fires Dakota.
The Acafellas are getting ready and Tanaka is putting on mascara, because it makes his eyes pop. Josh Groban is there in the audience.
The 'fellas perform "I Wanna Sex You Up" with Sandy. Puck sings and dances well, getting on the floor, grinding a bit. Sue's reaction shot to this is GOLD. Half sneer, half lust. Jane Lynch, Emmys next year, count on it.
After the very successful show, the guys backstage meet Josh Groban. Turns out he actually came there to tell Sandy to stop emailing him, sending nude pics, sonnets, locks of hair, etc. He gives Sandy a restraining order and tells the Acafellas that the show was great.
Josh Groban hangs and talks to Will's mom. He tells he's tired of throngs of screaming teens and apparently likes drunks old broads.
Having tasted musical success, Will realizes that being a teacher is enough for him. His dad is happy for him and tells Will that he's decided to go to law school, that it's never too late.
Mercedes apologizes to Kurt for breaking his window. He says it doesn't matter anyway because his dad took his car away after he found Kurt's tiara collection. Kurt confesses that he doesn't really like Rachel and tells Mercedes simply, "I'm gay." He's never told anyone before and seems scared but relieved. Mercedes is okay with it. Kurt isn't ready to share this with the rest of Glee yet.
Sue is pissed her plan failed, and that Glee is more confident than ever. She makes the cheerleaders smell their own armpits so they'll know "the smell of failure." She revokes their tanning privileges for the rest of the semester. Quinn thanks her for teaching her that when you believe in yourself, you don't have to bring others down. Hmm. Quinn turning on Sue, and towards Glee for real? We'll see.
Glee is rehearsing as they were at the beginning. Rachel tells Will that the dancing is really good.
Next week: Sue and Sandy team up to take on Glee. Intriguing.
So You Think You Can Dance, Season 6: Auditions
Audition City: Phoenix, AZ
Judges: Nigel Lythgoe, Mary Murphy, Mia Michaels
Cat Deeley is wearing a white peasant blouse embroidered with red flowers. Very pretty. Are they still letting her style herself?
Moving on...
We meet a short black guy named Brendan who goes by "Shorty," and his dancing partner, Demetrio, a really fat guy nicknamed "Biggie." Highly original, boys. In an effort to display their sensitivity, the sound editors have bouncing sound effects whenever Biggie jumps and lands. Niiiice.
They're NOT a disaster, actually. Hip hop, mild popping. Shorty is stronger by far, the overall effect is entertaining. The judges put Shorty through to the Choregraphy Round.
Next up: Sasha Mallory, who made it to Vegas during Season 4. Her family is watching her perform today and she feels more comfortable. She's wearing a white tank dress over what looks like a bright red leotard, and she's holding a red rose. Her audition is contemporary. Very nice, you can see her telling a story. Good technique overall. Mia likes it. Mary thinks it was beautiful. Sasha's weeping in joy. Straight to Vegas once again for Sasha.
We see brief auditions from:
An 18 year old brunette named Katie. She's wearing an unbuttoned plaid shirt. Are we bringing grunge to contemporary dance? Alright then. Gets ticket to Vegas.
Next: Ellie Soto, 21, also going to Vegas
And here comes the big weepy Human Interest Audition where courage is saluted, and tears shed, and dancing ability becomes secondary!
Meet Allison Becker, 21. She had spinal meningitis as a child,and is deaf now. She feels the music instead of using her ears, the vibrations keep her on rhythm, and she wants to be role model. There's something very gymnastic about her dancing. She's okay, but not good enough. The judges are very serious watching her. Nigel says her face is beautiful. Of course. She's blonde, and Nigel loves his young blondes. Her technique is not as good as he would like it. He notes that if it wasn't written down, he'd never know she was hearing impaired. Mary knows it hasn't been easy. Her cousin was in the same position..here comes the BIG MARY TEARS! Very Tammy Faye of her. Her cousin gave up when she was Allison's age, but Allison hasn't. Mary's crying but she claims that she's actually very happy. Mia asks Allison what inspires her, because for Mia, it's music that inspires her dancing. Allison says that it's music for her too, only she hears it differently.
After all this adoration, they send her to Choreography.
This year, we have another same-sex ballroom pair. There was a pair who auditioned last year, and Nigel scorned them for being a man-man pairing. The couple last year actually sucked, but these guys are Ballroom Champions. Awww, they met in line during season 2 of the show. Their names are Willem de Vries and Jacob Jason. They're really good. Nigel looks initially put out that they aren't terrible. He loudly says over the music, "They've got great lines to it!" Way to overcompensate, Nige. During the judges' remarks, Mia is welling up. Mia says that she celebrates their courage to expose themselves (teehee) and their hearts. Mary is proud of them. Nigel says thanks for showing him that same sex ballroom can be very strong and good. He admits he got himself into trouble last time. He then asks them to do choreography.The tall partner volunteers the information that they do like dancing with girls as well. I'm sure Nigel is relieved.
Quick joke audition from Jonathan Noronha. He uses short batons (and drops one), and then spells out "disco" with letters on paper. It's pretty funny, actually. He's not the worst I've ever seen on the show, by far. Definite no for him, though.
The 1st Day ends. Anya and Pasha run the Choreography round, in Latin ballroom.
Biggie quits, saying that he'll try harder next time, but this is not his thing. Shorty is not sent to Vegas, he's just not good enough.
Allison the deafie, Jacob, Willem, and 12 others are going to Vegas.
Day 2 In Phoenix
First dancer up is Jarvis Johnson, 18, a hyperactive, screechy fireball.He literally dances his shoes off and slaps his ass during his not-bad routine. He's a good club-hip hop dancer, great drops, but cannot break at all. At one point during the judges' remarks, he declares he's a box of chocolates. Comparing yourself to a Forrest Gump quote, not a promising sign! Nigel says that he's a great entertainer, not a great dancer. Mia says he's sunshine, and says yes to Choreo. Nigel says he can go to choreo, but if he doesn't pick it up quickly, he has to leave. Well that's kind of a dick move.
Freakshow auditions montage set to "People are Strange." At one point, Nigel asks, "How close are we to Roswell?" Well, it's in another state entirely, so not that close, Nigel.
Next Phoenix weirdo: Kelsey White. A cute blonde. Oh, Nigel is going to cream his knickers over this one. She's just okay. They ask if she's ever been kidnapped by
aliens? And Kelsey says,"Just once." Nigel walks off stage jokingly. Calls from off stage "Yes to choreography" a couple times. Mary and Mia agree with that.
Finally, we get to Jonathan 'Legacy' Perez, 27. He's gotten some hype already. He's an amazing bboy dancer. He lives up to his hype, definitely the most striking we've seen audition so far. He does what Nigel calls a "back-handed duckwalk" that is wicked cool. Nigel is hugely excited. Mary agrees "exciting". The judges acknowledge that Legacy assisted a choreographer last year. Mia says he's stupid, but in a good way. Mia loves her ghetto words, they sound fabulous coming out of the mouth of a middle-aged white woman wearing frosted lipstick. Legacy is off to Vegas, of course. He's pure Top 20 material.
The final Choreography round in Phoenix: Jarvis Johnson collapses,and paramedics attend to him. His sunshine is gone, he's teary-eyed and panicky, having had an asthma attack. He's okay finally.
NO, to Kelsey the UFO girl. Pretty sure Nigel wants to anal probe her though.
Five anonymous others are put through to Vegas. No names, very indistinct.
Next week: Boston
Judges: Nigel Lythgoe, Mary Murphy, Mia Michaels
Cat Deeley is wearing a white peasant blouse embroidered with red flowers. Very pretty. Are they still letting her style herself?
Moving on...
We meet a short black guy named Brendan who goes by "Shorty," and his dancing partner, Demetrio, a really fat guy nicknamed "Biggie." Highly original, boys. In an effort to display their sensitivity, the sound editors have bouncing sound effects whenever Biggie jumps and lands. Niiiice.
They're NOT a disaster, actually. Hip hop, mild popping. Shorty is stronger by far, the overall effect is entertaining. The judges put Shorty through to the Choregraphy Round.
Next up: Sasha Mallory, who made it to Vegas during Season 4. Her family is watching her perform today and she feels more comfortable. She's wearing a white tank dress over what looks like a bright red leotard, and she's holding a red rose. Her audition is contemporary. Very nice, you can see her telling a story. Good technique overall. Mia likes it. Mary thinks it was beautiful. Sasha's weeping in joy. Straight to Vegas once again for Sasha.
We see brief auditions from:
An 18 year old brunette named Katie. She's wearing an unbuttoned plaid shirt. Are we bringing grunge to contemporary dance? Alright then. Gets ticket to Vegas.
Next: Ellie Soto, 21, also going to Vegas
And here comes the big weepy Human Interest Audition where courage is saluted, and tears shed, and dancing ability becomes secondary!
Meet Allison Becker, 21. She had spinal meningitis as a child,and is deaf now. She feels the music instead of using her ears, the vibrations keep her on rhythm, and she wants to be role model. There's something very gymnastic about her dancing. She's okay, but not good enough. The judges are very serious watching her. Nigel says her face is beautiful. Of course. She's blonde, and Nigel loves his young blondes. Her technique is not as good as he would like it. He notes that if it wasn't written down, he'd never know she was hearing impaired. Mary knows it hasn't been easy. Her cousin was in the same position..here comes the BIG MARY TEARS! Very Tammy Faye of her. Her cousin gave up when she was Allison's age, but Allison hasn't. Mary's crying but she claims that she's actually very happy. Mia asks Allison what inspires her, because for Mia, it's music that inspires her dancing. Allison says that it's music for her too, only she hears it differently.
After all this adoration, they send her to Choreography.
This year, we have another same-sex ballroom pair. There was a pair who auditioned last year, and Nigel scorned them for being a man-man pairing. The couple last year actually sucked, but these guys are Ballroom Champions. Awww, they met in line during season 2 of the show. Their names are Willem de Vries and Jacob Jason. They're really good. Nigel looks initially put out that they aren't terrible. He loudly says over the music, "They've got great lines to it!" Way to overcompensate, Nige. During the judges' remarks, Mia is welling up. Mia says that she celebrates their courage to expose themselves (teehee) and their hearts. Mary is proud of them. Nigel says thanks for showing him that same sex ballroom can be very strong and good. He admits he got himself into trouble last time. He then asks them to do choreography.The tall partner volunteers the information that they do like dancing with girls as well. I'm sure Nigel is relieved.
Quick joke audition from Jonathan Noronha. He uses short batons (and drops one), and then spells out "disco" with letters on paper. It's pretty funny, actually. He's not the worst I've ever seen on the show, by far. Definite no for him, though.
The 1st Day ends. Anya and Pasha run the Choreography round, in Latin ballroom.
Biggie quits, saying that he'll try harder next time, but this is not his thing. Shorty is not sent to Vegas, he's just not good enough.
Allison the deafie, Jacob, Willem, and 12 others are going to Vegas.
Day 2 In Phoenix
First dancer up is Jarvis Johnson, 18, a hyperactive, screechy fireball.He literally dances his shoes off and slaps his ass during his not-bad routine. He's a good club-hip hop dancer, great drops, but cannot break at all. At one point during the judges' remarks, he declares he's a box of chocolates. Comparing yourself to a Forrest Gump quote, not a promising sign! Nigel says that he's a great entertainer, not a great dancer. Mia says he's sunshine, and says yes to Choreo. Nigel says he can go to choreo, but if he doesn't pick it up quickly, he has to leave. Well that's kind of a dick move.
Freakshow auditions montage set to "People are Strange." At one point, Nigel asks, "How close are we to Roswell?" Well, it's in another state entirely, so not that close, Nigel.
Next Phoenix weirdo: Kelsey White. A cute blonde. Oh, Nigel is going to cream his knickers over this one. She's just okay. They ask if she's ever been kidnapped by
aliens? And Kelsey says,"Just once." Nigel walks off stage jokingly. Calls from off stage "Yes to choreography" a couple times. Mary and Mia agree with that.
Finally, we get to Jonathan 'Legacy' Perez, 27. He's gotten some hype already. He's an amazing bboy dancer. He lives up to his hype, definitely the most striking we've seen audition so far. He does what Nigel calls a "back-handed duckwalk" that is wicked cool. Nigel is hugely excited. Mary agrees "exciting". The judges acknowledge that Legacy assisted a choreographer last year. Mia says he's stupid, but in a good way. Mia loves her ghetto words, they sound fabulous coming out of the mouth of a middle-aged white woman wearing frosted lipstick. Legacy is off to Vegas, of course. He's pure Top 20 material.
The final Choreography round in Phoenix: Jarvis Johnson collapses,and paramedics attend to him. His sunshine is gone, he's teary-eyed and panicky, having had an asthma attack. He's okay finally.
NO, to Kelsey the UFO girl. Pretty sure Nigel wants to anal probe her though.
Five anonymous others are put through to Vegas. No names, very indistinct.
Next week: Boston
Behind The Music
Do ya like a good music documentary or live concert movie? Me too. I don't make it out to see live music NEARLY as much as I used to, so sometimes living vicariously through a DVD is about the best I can do. Here are a few of my favorites -
Beastie Boys - "Awesome, I Fuckin' Shot That!"
Much more of a concert video than a documentary, "Awesome, I Fuckin' Shot That!" took the novel concept of passing out 50 hand-held video cameras to an equal number of fans at the Beasties' 2004 Madison Square Garden show. As one would expect, the quality of the footage isn't always the greatest, but the advantage to shooting in this fashion is its immediacy. You absolutely feel like you are THERE every step of the way, and thanks to Nathaniel Hornblower's mad editing skills in the Avid suite (and the costume department), the sensation of being on as many drugs as the average Beasties show requires is more than achieved. It's an absolutely fantastic show from start to finish, and while I won't give anything away, the finale is probably one of the best moments in live music I've seen in a while. WARNING: If you are prone to motion sickness, this concert video's shaky-cam approach might not be for you. Or just rock some Dramamine and a funky barf bag. Your call.
Red Hot Chili Peppers - "Funky Monks"
To record their career-making 1991 album 'Blood Sugar Sex Magik', the Red Hot Chili Peppers holed up in a supposedly haunted mansion in the Hollywood hills. Director Gavin Bowden shot this documentary during those sessions, and the result is probably the most intimate and honest portrayal of the Chili Peppers anyone has ever seen. Anthony, Flea, Chad, and John are all still their wise-cracking selves throughout the doc, of course, but beyond that, various interviews and confessionals with each of the band members take us a little deeper inside each one of them and their motivations and aspirations in recording the album. If you're even the slightest fan of what in my opinion is the band's best and most coherent album, this doc is an absolute must-see. Watching the Peppers squirm while hanging by their feet from a pole 20 feet in the air for a photo shoot never fails to make me laugh.
Here's a clip from the doc showing John Frusciante getting straight-up ridiculous while laying down a solo. Fuck it up, Johnny!
Fugazi - "Instrument"
Arguably the greatest post-punk band ever, Washington DC's Fugazi culled together 2001's 'Instrument' as a 10-year anniversary present to the fans. I'm going to be honest here - 'Instrument' is not the greatest movie ever made. In fact, it gets absolutely infuriating in parts. There are far too many ridiculously artsy-fartsy and detached segments of the movie to escape criticism, its 2-hour running time is excessive, and the fact that not a single song is ever heard in its entirety throughout the flick DRIVES ME CRAZY. However, ask any die-hard Fugazi fan their opinion of 'Instrument', and they will tell you exactly what I would - it is absolutely essential. From the blazing live performances from every period of the band's career to Guy's hilarious and elaborate plan to assassinate George Burns right before his 100th birthday, 'Instrument' brings the goods (and bads) to any true fan's collection. Don't miss the accompanying soundtrack album, either. Little Debbie's mom gone CRAZY!
Beastie Boys - "Awesome, I Fuckin' Shot That!"
Much more of a concert video than a documentary, "Awesome, I Fuckin' Shot That!" took the novel concept of passing out 50 hand-held video cameras to an equal number of fans at the Beasties' 2004 Madison Square Garden show. As one would expect, the quality of the footage isn't always the greatest, but the advantage to shooting in this fashion is its immediacy. You absolutely feel like you are THERE every step of the way, and thanks to Nathaniel Hornblower's mad editing skills in the Avid suite (and the costume department), the sensation of being on as many drugs as the average Beasties show requires is more than achieved. It's an absolutely fantastic show from start to finish, and while I won't give anything away, the finale is probably one of the best moments in live music I've seen in a while. WARNING: If you are prone to motion sickness, this concert video's shaky-cam approach might not be for you. Or just rock some Dramamine and a funky barf bag. Your call.
Red Hot Chili Peppers - "Funky Monks"
To record their career-making 1991 album 'Blood Sugar Sex Magik', the Red Hot Chili Peppers holed up in a supposedly haunted mansion in the Hollywood hills. Director Gavin Bowden shot this documentary during those sessions, and the result is probably the most intimate and honest portrayal of the Chili Peppers anyone has ever seen. Anthony, Flea, Chad, and John are all still their wise-cracking selves throughout the doc, of course, but beyond that, various interviews and confessionals with each of the band members take us a little deeper inside each one of them and their motivations and aspirations in recording the album. If you're even the slightest fan of what in my opinion is the band's best and most coherent album, this doc is an absolute must-see. Watching the Peppers squirm while hanging by their feet from a pole 20 feet in the air for a photo shoot never fails to make me laugh.
Here's a clip from the doc showing John Frusciante getting straight-up ridiculous while laying down a solo. Fuck it up, Johnny!
Fugazi - "Instrument"
Arguably the greatest post-punk band ever, Washington DC's Fugazi culled together 2001's 'Instrument' as a 10-year anniversary present to the fans. I'm going to be honest here - 'Instrument' is not the greatest movie ever made. In fact, it gets absolutely infuriating in parts. There are far too many ridiculously artsy-fartsy and detached segments of the movie to escape criticism, its 2-hour running time is excessive, and the fact that not a single song is ever heard in its entirety throughout the flick DRIVES ME CRAZY. However, ask any die-hard Fugazi fan their opinion of 'Instrument', and they will tell you exactly what I would - it is absolutely essential. From the blazing live performances from every period of the band's career to Guy's hilarious and elaborate plan to assassinate George Burns right before his 100th birthday, 'Instrument' brings the goods (and bads) to any true fan's collection. Don't miss the accompanying soundtrack album, either. Little Debbie's mom gone CRAZY!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
Seven Small Wonders of the Cinematic World
Plain and simple, these are seven indies, small-budget flicks, and B-movies that I love.
House of Games (1987)
Renowned playwright David Mamet made his directorial debut with this twisty psychological game of a film. Lindsay Crouse plays a psychiatrist drawn into and fascinated by the world of con artists, guided by Joe Mantegna. We're drawn in too, by the shady underworld, and the clever, ruthless men who populate it. Mamet's blunt and brilliant dialogue is never sharper than in this movie. Bonus points for casting magician, sleight-of-hand and con expert Ricky Jay.
Metropolitan (1990)
Whit Stillman's debut film depicts sensible young socialist Tom Townsend (Edward Clements) attending parties with wealthy ex-prep school classmates who now spend their weekends attending Manhattan debutante balls and defending their privileged lives. Perennial outsider Tom finds himself becoming one of the upper-crust gang, being pursued by one woman while pining for another. The friends revel in drinking, smoking, and witty banter, especially in the character of Nick, played by Chris Eigeman. Favorite Nick quotes include, "It's a tiny bit arrogant of people to go around worrying about those less fortunate," and "I've always planned to be a failure anyway, that's why I plan to marry an extremely wealthy woman." The comedy is extremely intelligent but always funny, finding truth and humor in this lot of blossoming yuppies that we initially sneer at, much like Tom does.
The Chocolate War (1988)
Adapted from Robert Cormier's classic young adult novel, the Chocolate War begins when a new student at a Catholic school (Ilan-Mitchell Smith) refuses to participate in the annual fund-raising candy sale. The shadow government of the school, a secret club of boys who hand out mostly arbitrary "assignments" to keep students under their thumb, are enlisted by the manipulative headmaster (John Glover) to pressure the new boy to conform. The movie ending is somewhat different than the book's, but I think the new version of the final battle is more complex and does convey the same message about resisting conformity, but in a more cinematic way. With either ending, the story is unusually dark and brutally honest for a tale aimed at teens. That's why I love it.
Polish Vampire in Burbank (1985)
My friend discovered Polish Vampire in Burbank in a video store when we were in high school. It was a copy, not the original VHS tape, and was encased in a plain black cover. Not a very promising introduction to the movie, but as it turns out, it's the perfect intro to the best/worst B-movie you'll ever see. Actually, 'B-movie' might be too high of a ranking. The movie was made for $2500, and it looks like it. It's the story of fanged loser Dupah (Mark Pirro), who comes from a family of vampires but hasn't yet made his first kill. His dad kicks him out, ordering him to finally step up and get his own blood instead of drinking leftovers out of a baggie. His sister helps him meet a sweet girl named Delores (Lori Sutton), who falls for him. Will they live happily ever after? You'll see, and laugh your ass off the whole while.
Saved! (2004)
Faith in God is skewered, examined, lost, and reclaimed in this hilarious and warm movie about a Christian-school senior (Jena Malone) who gets pregnant after trying to de-gay her boyfriend. Preggo Mary is ostracised by the Christian Jewels club, and befriends a wild Jewish classmate (Eva Amurri) and a cynical wheelchair-bound boy played by Macaulay Culkin. The movie's filled with strong performances, including Mary Louise Parker as Mary's religious-but-cool mom, Martin Donovan as the school's conflicted principal, and Mandy Moore as a psycho Jesus freak with a gun. Chock full of memorable scenes and lines like this one from Hilary Faye (Moore) at the shooting range- "Sure Jesus could restore my physical and spiritual virginity, especially if I lost it to some rapist, but who wants that? I'm saving myself for marriage, and I'll use force if necessary."
Frailty (2001)
I am not a fan of Bill Paxton as a rule, but this is the exception. Paxton directed and starred in this very well done psychological thriller, the story of a father who has a vision that he's been singled out by God to kill "demons" disguised as humans. His two young sons, Fenton (Matt O'Leary) and Adam (Jeremy Sumpter), witness their father's destructive acts. Adam believes in his father's mad ramblings about being God's Hands, while the older boy Fenton tries to stop the killings. To say more would spoil the plot details of this unpredictable film. In fact, I'm not including the imdb link to Frailty, because it has a major plot spoiler right on the main details page. Go rent or buy the movie yourself. This is a damn good film, made for around $11 million which is chump change by studio standards. It wasn't a hit, and it should have been.
Gas Food Lodging (1992)
Shade (Fairuza Balk) is a lushly romantic soul, while her older sister Trudi (Ione Skye) is world-weary of men before she's out of her teens. Their mother (Brooke Adams) struggles to raise her daughters in a trailer in New Mexico, while waitressing and hooking up with a sweet-talking cable guy. This is not a cutesy rom-com, by any means. Shade embarassingly pursues a male friend, in between dreaming at the Mexican cinema and fighting with her family. Bitter Trudi begins to hope for something more than life in the dusty desert town, and wants to believe she's wrong about men after she meets a wandering rock-hunter who shows her the world in a new light. The plot isn't substantial, but director Allison Anders creates a wonderful, sensual mood, as the women's desire for love guides their way through the story. There is sadness, and beauty, and exhilaration in the turns of their paths.
House of Games (1987)
Renowned playwright David Mamet made his directorial debut with this twisty psychological game of a film. Lindsay Crouse plays a psychiatrist drawn into and fascinated by the world of con artists, guided by Joe Mantegna. We're drawn in too, by the shady underworld, and the clever, ruthless men who populate it. Mamet's blunt and brilliant dialogue is never sharper than in this movie. Bonus points for casting magician, sleight-of-hand and con expert Ricky Jay.
Metropolitan (1990)
Whit Stillman's debut film depicts sensible young socialist Tom Townsend (Edward Clements) attending parties with wealthy ex-prep school classmates who now spend their weekends attending Manhattan debutante balls and defending their privileged lives. Perennial outsider Tom finds himself becoming one of the upper-crust gang, being pursued by one woman while pining for another. The friends revel in drinking, smoking, and witty banter, especially in the character of Nick, played by Chris Eigeman. Favorite Nick quotes include, "It's a tiny bit arrogant of people to go around worrying about those less fortunate," and "I've always planned to be a failure anyway, that's why I plan to marry an extremely wealthy woman." The comedy is extremely intelligent but always funny, finding truth and humor in this lot of blossoming yuppies that we initially sneer at, much like Tom does.
The Chocolate War (1988)
Adapted from Robert Cormier's classic young adult novel, the Chocolate War begins when a new student at a Catholic school (Ilan-Mitchell Smith) refuses to participate in the annual fund-raising candy sale. The shadow government of the school, a secret club of boys who hand out mostly arbitrary "assignments" to keep students under their thumb, are enlisted by the manipulative headmaster (John Glover) to pressure the new boy to conform. The movie ending is somewhat different than the book's, but I think the new version of the final battle is more complex and does convey the same message about resisting conformity, but in a more cinematic way. With either ending, the story is unusually dark and brutally honest for a tale aimed at teens. That's why I love it.
Polish Vampire in Burbank (1985)
My friend discovered Polish Vampire in Burbank in a video store when we were in high school. It was a copy, not the original VHS tape, and was encased in a plain black cover. Not a very promising introduction to the movie, but as it turns out, it's the perfect intro to the best/worst B-movie you'll ever see. Actually, 'B-movie' might be too high of a ranking. The movie was made for $2500, and it looks like it. It's the story of fanged loser Dupah (Mark Pirro), who comes from a family of vampires but hasn't yet made his first kill. His dad kicks him out, ordering him to finally step up and get his own blood instead of drinking leftovers out of a baggie. His sister helps him meet a sweet girl named Delores (Lori Sutton), who falls for him. Will they live happily ever after? You'll see, and laugh your ass off the whole while.
Saved! (2004)
Faith in God is skewered, examined, lost, and reclaimed in this hilarious and warm movie about a Christian-school senior (Jena Malone) who gets pregnant after trying to de-gay her boyfriend. Preggo Mary is ostracised by the Christian Jewels club, and befriends a wild Jewish classmate (Eva Amurri) and a cynical wheelchair-bound boy played by Macaulay Culkin. The movie's filled with strong performances, including Mary Louise Parker as Mary's religious-but-cool mom, Martin Donovan as the school's conflicted principal, and Mandy Moore as a psycho Jesus freak with a gun. Chock full of memorable scenes and lines like this one from Hilary Faye (Moore) at the shooting range- "Sure Jesus could restore my physical and spiritual virginity, especially if I lost it to some rapist, but who wants that? I'm saving myself for marriage, and I'll use force if necessary."
Frailty (2001)
I am not a fan of Bill Paxton as a rule, but this is the exception. Paxton directed and starred in this very well done psychological thriller, the story of a father who has a vision that he's been singled out by God to kill "demons" disguised as humans. His two young sons, Fenton (Matt O'Leary) and Adam (Jeremy Sumpter), witness their father's destructive acts. Adam believes in his father's mad ramblings about being God's Hands, while the older boy Fenton tries to stop the killings. To say more would spoil the plot details of this unpredictable film. In fact, I'm not including the imdb link to Frailty, because it has a major plot spoiler right on the main details page. Go rent or buy the movie yourself. This is a damn good film, made for around $11 million which is chump change by studio standards. It wasn't a hit, and it should have been.
Gas Food Lodging (1992)
Shade (Fairuza Balk) is a lushly romantic soul, while her older sister Trudi (Ione Skye) is world-weary of men before she's out of her teens. Their mother (Brooke Adams) struggles to raise her daughters in a trailer in New Mexico, while waitressing and hooking up with a sweet-talking cable guy. This is not a cutesy rom-com, by any means. Shade embarassingly pursues a male friend, in between dreaming at the Mexican cinema and fighting with her family. Bitter Trudi begins to hope for something more than life in the dusty desert town, and wants to believe she's wrong about men after she meets a wandering rock-hunter who shows her the world in a new light. The plot isn't substantial, but director Allison Anders creates a wonderful, sensual mood, as the women's desire for love guides their way through the story. There is sadness, and beauty, and exhilaration in the turns of their paths.
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